Tuesday, January 14th, 2003
Guest: no guest
Host: Adam, Dr. Drew
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Show Summary:
Adam does rant about Gym membership salesman (and gym culture), the profession of boyfriend of the "your pussy is broken" caller.
Recording Info:
timex2
Size: 41.53 MB
Length: 1:30:43
Bitrate: 64kb/s CBR
Funny episode, until the end.
“Your pussy is broken”- Caller “Listen honey, your couzz is on the Fritz.”- Adam
Things take a heavy turn in the last 15 minutes.
A 23 year old caller has a 10 and 4 year old kid. Boyfriend was killed in a car accident. She is surprisingly well put together despite her past.
Also, a guy calls in who’s mother was killed 15 years ago with an ice pick. The killer is getting out of jail soon. Guy wants to know how to deal with it.
Worth a listen.
Adam does rant about Gym membership salesman (and gym culture), the profession of boyfriend of the “your pussy is broken” caller.
Adam’s play with the caller with the broken honeypot are hysterical. I am now dying for a reason to suggest that someone’s cooze may on the fritz.
Dr. Drew asking a blind girl where she lives.
Adam: She doesn’t know Drew!
That was a good call, and overall good episode.
The hilarious “gym manager” call:
http://www.mediafire.com/?zlwdnnuhvk57kwr
See my comments on 5/29/2003 for a postscript on the “cooze is on the fritz/gym manager” call:
http://www.lovelinetapes.com/shows/?id=3108&h=ZmI0NzNlZjc
I’m not sure if Adam and Drew weren’t following the story correctly, or are just on edge, but I really think they were too hard on this guy. I thought he did a great job explaining his situation, and if he was explaining the full story I think it was logical for the gf to eventually tell him. They just hung up on him. 0:19:08
The first call with the blind girl is gold from beginning to end. GOLD Jerry!
Drew: “You’re calling from Wyoming, where are you?”
Adam in a how dare you tone: “She doesn’t know Drew! She’s blind. She has to take everyone’s word for where she is. Maybe you’re in some crap hole like Riverside and your parents are just being kind. ‘Oh honey we’re in Wyoming.'”
Drew: “How weird is it that I just spent two hours reading my daughter a book about a blind boy and his dog?”
Caller: “Really? Well I don’t know I think most people think blind people have sex with their dogs.” Apparently blind people are not immune to the random non sequitur disease that seeing Loveline callers have.
Adam: “I don’t think that sweety, I KNOW it.”
Caller: “I don’t know, I wouldn’t disagree.” lol what?
Adam: “Like I said, I’d tell my kid we were in Wyoming. We’d be standing next to the Winnebago, ‘we’re looking at miles of rolling green hills and prairies and the Grand Tetons, meanwhile we’re staring at a burnt out Winnebago with a hobo trying to have sex with the gas orifice.”
Drew: “How would you explain the smell of crack and speed labs?”
Adam: “Oh I’d say ‘a wild buffalo just farted.”
She goes on to give a raving review of her parents.
Caller: “My dad’s a little wuss, he’s a little pussy. He tolerates my mom, she doesn’t have a job, she just tells him how to spend his hard-earned money while she sits on her fat ass all day.”
They ask about her love life.
Caller: “I have a boyfriend of almost nine months.”
Adam: “He’s 6’4″ with long flowing blonde hair and rippling biceps, but I’m not allowed to touch him.”
She admits that he’s probably pretty ugly because they’ve agreed that she’s going out with him because she can’t see how he looks and he’s going out with her because he can’t get anyone else.
Her question is regarding the ugly boyfriend. She says she has a very small mouth that even prevented her from getting braces without them taking out like half of her teeth. This also makes blowjobs difficult. She tried to give her boyfriend head and ending up throwing up all over his equipmunk.
Adam tells her to practice brushing the back of her tongue and see if that doesn’t help.
The teeth-whitening bit was notable in being one of a handful of on-air instances where Anderson comes to Adam’s defence.
00:58:20 Adam rattles off a spot-on gym manager impression
I swear the caller (Jennifer 23) in the last twenty minutes of the show changes the age of her younger kid from eight to four. She initially said eight but then when questioned by Adam about ages she says four.